Society and social media make us feel like we should be fighting the natural ageing process - bio-hack your way to a longer life, try this cream to stop the clock, avoid this, add that. But growing older is a privilege. And sometimes imagining yourself as an older version of you is exactly the mindset shift you need to shake up your routine, take more risks and do more of the real memory-making.
The “Future You at 80” Perspective
Imagine it’s your 80th birthday. You’re surrounded by the people you love, a warm tea (or something stronger) in hand, and you’re quietly reflecting on the life you’ve lived.
What do you remember? The two-hour teams call? The late-night scrolling session? Probably not. What would actually feel important from the vantage point of 80?
In the present, the micro-moments don’t feel that significant. Booking that last-minute trip. Baking with your best friend and absolutely ruining the recipe. Hiking a mountain you weren’t sure you could. Yet these are the moments older-you will return to - the ones filled with connection, love, laughter, and the times you did something that scared you a little.
Like Andy Bernard says in The Office: “I wish there was a way to know you're in the good old days, before you've actually left them.”
And while the magic lies in not knowing, imagining yourself looking back at your life can help you live more fully now and cherish those small, ordinary moments before they become precious.
The Science Behind Imagining Your Older Self
1. Your brain treats ‘Future You’ like a stranger
Psychologist Hal Hershfield found that when we think about our future selves, the brain responds in the same way it does when thinking about other people. That means present-you often makes choices with very little regard for future-you’s happiness.
Which helps explain why it’s so tempting to:
- stay late at work even when you’re shattered
- stay glued to your phone when you’re with people you care about
- prioritise productivity over presence
- avoid doing hard or scary thing
However, even a few minutes spent imagining yourself decades older can shift your behaviour. It makes ‘Future You’ feel more real. And when they feel real, you start making kinder, wiser choices with them in mind. This is called future-self continuity, and it’s one of the most powerful behavioural nudges we have.
2. What people actually regret at the end of life
Palliative care nurse Bronnie Ware spent years listening to people reflect on their lives in their final days. And the regrets were heartbreakingly simple. They weren’t wishing they’d earned more. Or answered more emails.
The top answers were:
- “I wish I hadn’t worked so much.”
- “I wish I’d had the courage to a live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me”
- “I wish I’d stayed in touch with people I love.”
- “I wish I’d let myself be happier.”
- “I wish I’d lived a life true to myself.”
When you’re 80, do you think you’d wish you’d spent more time on your phone? Or replaying a spelling mistake in a presentation? They wished they’d been more present and authentic, with themselves and with the people they loved.
3. Why the small moments are the big ones
Behavioural economists Daniel Kahneman and Amos Tversky discovered the Peak-End Rule, which basically says our brains don’t remember every detail of an experience. Instead, we remember the emotional peak and the ending.
We don’t remember every moment, in every detail. We remember the moments that made us feel. Which means your “good old days” aren’t defined by long stretches of perfection, or what you were wearing. The memories are built from pockets of joy and connection scattered throughout moments.
Examples of lessons from your 80 year old self
1. You’re allowed to slow down.
No one remembers being endlessly busy. Busy isn’t a badge of honour. You are allowed to slow down. Go for a walk with your friend, clock off at 6pm to have dinner with your family.
2. People matter more than productivity.
Your older self will recall your relationships and small moments with the people you love. Carve out time to spend with friends, meet new people, spend a few moments chatting to a stranger.
3. Take the risk. Book the thing. Say yes.
You won’t regret looking silly. But you might regret never giving something a go. Try the new sport, book the trip, go to the social. Taking no steps will leave you standing in the same place.
4. Notice the tiny joys.
You can’t notice the small moments if your staring at your phone. Be present with the people around you, notice the little things.
5. Put your phone down.
You are not going to regret spending 6 hours a day on your phone. Use your phone as a tool, not the main source of dopamine and entertainment.
Your future self isn’t a distant stranger. They’re you, just a little older, a little wiser. So: slow down. Be present. Make space. Say yes when your heart nudges you. Because when you do, you’re writing a future that your 80-year-old self will look back on with a little smile.
