Some of us might be walking around in a state we can't quite name. Not anxious, not burnt out, just... a bit on. A bit frazzled. Like you're permanently running on low battery and nothing can quite recharge you.
There's a good chance your nervous system is dysregulated. And in a society built around constant notifications, 24-hour news, packed schedules and screens everywhere, that's not surprising. The good news is you can reset it. And spring, with its longer days and natural pull towards a fresh start, is a good time to try.
What is your nervous system? And why does it matter?
Your nervous system controls how your body responds to the world around you. You've probably heard of "fight or flight" - that shot of adrenaline when your heart is racing, your body tensing up ready to react. That's your sympathetic nervous system kicking in. But what you might not know is that it has a counterpart: the parasympathetic nervous system, sometimes called "rest and digest", which is responsible for bringing you back down. Slowing your heart rate, relaxing your muscles, letting you breathe properly again.
In a healthy, regulated nervous system, these two states work together. You respond to a stressful situation, and then you recover from it. The problem is that modern life bombards us with low-level stressors so constantly (notifications, news, emails, noise, pressure) that many of us never fully make it back to the recovery side. Our bodies stay stuck in a mild but persistent version of fight or flight, and over time that becomes our new normal. We stop noticing it because it just feels like our “normal state”.
What does a dysregulated nervous system actually feel like?
Dysregulation doesn't always look like a panic attack or feel chaotic. Often it's much quieter than that. See if any of these feel familiar:
- You're tired but you can't switch off. You're exhausted but you can't sleep, or you wake at 3am with your brain already going.
- Rest feels uncomfortable. When you sit down to do nothing, you feel restless, guilty, or like you should be doing something else.
- You reach for your phone the second there's a quiet moment. Stillness feels almost unbearable, so you fill it automatically without thinking.
- Small things feel disproportionately stressful. A slow driver, a full inbox, a last-minute change of plan - your reaction feels bigger than the situation warrants.
- You feel wired but tired. Alert enough to feel stressed, but too exhausted to actually do anything about it.
- There's a low hum of anxiety you can't explain. No specific trigger, just a background feeling that something is wrong or something is coming.
- You startle easily. Your body reacts quickly to loud noises, unexpected messages or being put on the spot.
- You struggle to be present. Even during enjoyable moments, your mind is replaying something from yesterday or planning for tomorrow.
- You use screens to decompress. After a long day, scrolling feels like rest.
- Your body holds the tension. Tight jaw, clenched shoulders, shallow breathing, digestive issues.
If you're nodding, you might be dysregulated. This is extremely common and you're responding to a world that was not designed with your nervous system in mind.
Why modern life is particularly hard on your nervous system
Our nervous systems evolved for a different kind of world. One where threats were occasional, rest was built in, and information was distributed slowly. Today, we're processing more stimulation before 9am than our ancestors might have seen in a week.
The average person checks their phone over 100 times a day. We make an estimated 35,000 decisions a day, up from around 2,500 for most of human history. We're contactable at all hours, expected to respond quickly, and consuming news and content almost non-stop.
Every notification is a small alarm. Every scroll is more input to process. Every unread email is an unresolved loop keeping your brain on low-level alert. Multiply that by hundreds of times a day and it's not surprising your nervous system struggles to find its off switch.
How to spring clean your nervous system
Think of this the same way you'd think about opening the windows after a long winter to air the room. Your nervous system needs the same. Here are some practical changes that actually make a difference.
1. Go offline (properly)
There's a reason people come back from an Unplugged stay feeling like a different person. Removing yourself from constant digital noise, even for a short period, gives your nervous system permission to stop scanning. No notifications or no emails pulling at your attention.
But you don't need a three night cabin escape to feel the benefit (though we'd always recommend it). Even a few consistent hours offline each day can start to lower your baseline alert level. One screen-free evening a week is a good place to start.
2. Stop using your phone as the first and last thing
Your nervous system needs a gentle start to the morning. Checking emails or social media within minutes of waking pushes your brain into a stressed, reactive state before you've even had breakfast. The same goes for evenings - screens signal alertness at exactly the moment your brain needs to wind down.
A traditional alarm clock is a good starting point. It gets your phone out of the bedroom and removes the reflex to check it first and last thing. Even protecting just 30 minutes at each end of the day makes a noticeable difference.
3. Turn off most of your notifications
Your nervous system cannot regulate if it's in a constant state of micro-alert. Every notification is a small interruption that pulls your brain away from whatever it was doing. Research shows it can take up to 23 minutes to fully refocus after an interruption, which means most of us never fully refocus at all.
Go through your notification settings and turn off everything that doesn't need your immediate attention. Most apps don't. You can check things on your own terms rather than theirs.
4. Move your body and get outside
Movement is one of the most effective ways to bring your nervous system back to baseline. When your body is in a state of low-level stress, physical movement gives it somewhere to go - it completes the stress cycle rather than leaving it sitting unresolved.
You don't need an intense workout. A 20-minute walk in nature reduces cortisol by up to 21%. Getting outside in daylight, especially in the morning, helps regulate your sleep cycle too, which has a knock-on effect on your mood and how your nervous system copes throughout the day.
5. Swap screen time for analogue hobbies
Scrolling feels like switching off but your brain is still processing. Real recovery happens when you give it something slow like reading a physical book, cooking a meal that requires concentration, gardening, a jigsaw, drawing, walking without headphones. Here are 20 analogue hobby ideas to kick you off.
6. Don’t rush
One of the most overlooked ways to regulate your nervous system is stopping the constant rush. We hurry between tasks, eat lunch while checking emails, commute with something in our ears, and fill every quiet gap with something else. That pace keeps your system running at a level it was never meant to sustain.
Try eating at least one meal a day without a screen or background noise. Walk between meetings rather than rushing. Sit with a coffee before reaching for your phone. Let yourself be bored on the commute. These slow moments give your nervous system the space to process and come down.
7. Let yourself rest without earning it first
A dysregulated nervous system makes rest feel like something to be earned. There's always something else to do, and sitting still triggers guilt rather than ease. But rest isn't a reward. Running on empty has a cost, and it compounds.
Real rest means actually switching off. Not scrolling, not half-watching TV while answering messages, not lying down while your brain runs through tomorrow's to-do list. A slow walk, a nap, an afternoon in the garden, a long bath. The less guilty it feels, the better it's working.
8. Protect your sleep
Sleep is when your nervous system does its deepest recovery work. But quality matters as much as the number of hours. A dysregulated nervous system makes it harder to fall asleep and stay asleep, and poor sleep makes dysregulation worse. It goes in circles.
Phones in bed are one of the biggest culprits. The blue light suppresses melatonin, but beyond that, the content keeps your brain alert at exactly the wrong moment. Dim the lights, leave the screen alone for the last hour, and do something calm before you sleep.
What a regulated nervous system feels like
If you've been dysregulated for a while, it can be hard to remember what regulated actually feels like. Here's what you're working towards:
- You feel tired at night (genuinely, not wired-tired)
- You can sit in silence without immediately reaching for something
- Rest feels restorative rather than guilty
- Small inconveniences don't derail your whole day
- You feel present in conversations
- You sleep well and wake up feeling like you've actually slept
- Your body feels easier, less braced
A lot of people describe this feeling after a few days of proper disconnection. It's not an exceptional state to be in. It's your baseline. It's just been buried under a lot of noise.