Journaling isn't new. People have been writing down their thoughts and keeping daily diaries for centuries. But in the last few years, journalling has evolved into a wellness practice that makes it seem…complicated? That there is a right way to journal. You need a lovely leather bound book, or a journal with 10 prompts to answer every single day. That for it to count, we must tick off gratitudes and reflections and write in our best handwriting.
The aesthetic posts of beautiful journals have made it a popular practice, which is great because more people writing things down is only a good thing. But for some, the practice of journaling can still feel a little overwhelming. Where do I start? What prompts should I use? What’s the difference between a journal and a diary?
So I want to stick up for the humble diary. The no-frills, no-rules writing that doesn’t feel intimidating because there are literally no rules. All you’re writing about is your day (which you are the #1 expert on), and the rest can follow.
How optimisation culture overcomplicated journaling
At some point journaling stopped being just writing and became a wellness practice. And like most things that get the wellness treatment, it’s been over-optimised.
There are morning pages, evening reflections, gratitude journals and shadow work journals. There are apps that send you a prompt at 8am with streaks that make you feel guilty if you miss a day. Instagram is full of beautifully written leather journals and colour-coded habit trackers that look lovely and aspirational, but they also look slightly out of reach for a beginner.
None of this is bad. If a prompt helps you get going, brilliant. If rules help you start, fab. But the underlying message is that there's a right way to do it, and if you're not doing it that way you're missing out on the good stuff. For some of us that's enough to not bother at all. The perfectionist brain says “if I can't do it properly, why do it?” And the notebook goes back in the drawer.
But you don’t need a fancy journal or a science-backed strategy. You just need a notebook and a pen.
What's the difference between a diary and a journal?
If you want the textbook difference, a diary is a daily record of what happened and a journal is where you explore how you feel. One is documenting, the other is reflecting. But in real life, the line between what and why is much blurrier than that. Usually things that happen in a day and how you feel, overlap. So a diary and a journal are basically the same thing.
But to me, the term ‘diary’ feels a little more personal, and a little less rigid. Just look at Bridget Jones. If you grew up in the UK, she's a national treasure you rewatch winter after winter, and her diary is a big part of why she's so relatable. It's mostly the happenings of her day as she bumbles through adulthood. But somewhere in between the chaos, she stops and wonders why she said the thing she said, or why she feels the way she does. There was no fancy journal or prompts back then. The reflections turned up on their own.
I think it's easier to start with what happened and how you felt today, than it is to deep dive into your feelings. Writing down what happened asks nothing of you. And it can be short and sweet like:
Today I went for a walk before work…It was chilly now that autumn is arriving. I didn't want to go but I felt better after. I think I actually quite like autumn, it feels like the season I'm most at home in.
You can stop there or you can unpick it a bit further… Why didn't I want to go? Why did I feel better? You start with what you did and how you felt, and it eases you into writing about other things on your mind.
Why writing things down helps you process them
Think back to maths at school. If someone asked you 7 + 3, you'd do it in your head. But long division, or 432 x 76, you write it down. You break it into steps and work through one bit at a time to get to an answer.
Life is pretty similar. The simple sums you can do in your head, like what to have for tea or what to wear. But the complicated ones, a disagreement with a friend or a big decision about work, are too much to work out in your head. You end up over-thinking and ruminating rather than breaking it down.
Writing it down is doing the working out. Once it's on paper you can see the separate pieces. A problem that felt enormous turns into a few smaller ones, and smaller ones are much easier to deal with.
And like school maths, you don't have to get it right first time. You can cross things out, start again, try a different method. It’s seeing it on paper that can help you identify where you went wrong or where you’re struggling.
Why it's worth keeping a diary
A diary is a physical record of your life
We take thousands of photos a year and hardly look at any of them. They sit on our phones between a screenshot of a recipe and cloakroom ticket. A paper diary is a physical record of your life, with random thoughts and musings that you’d never take a picture of. You can read back over it and laugh, or be so proud of where you are now vs where you were. It’s basically a time capsule for each chapter of your life.
The mental health benefits of writing things down
Writing things down gets them out of the loop in your head and onto something you can look at. Worries that feel huge at night tend to shrink once they're written in plain words. You may start noticing patterns too, like how you always feel a bit flat on a Sunday evening, or how much better you sleep after a day outside.
The science backs this up too. A UCLA study found that putting a feeling into words calms down the brain's alarm system. And another study found that students who wrote down their worries just before a big exam did better than those who didn't.
It's also one of the few moments in the day that's just for you. No audience and nobody to perform for. You can be petty or completely unfair and it doesn't matter, because nobody is reading it but you.
How to start keeping a diary
Forget the prompts for a bit. Grab any old notebook (the one at the bottom of the drawer is perfect) and tonight, write down what you did today. Where you went and what you had for dinner. If a thought turns up, follow it. If it doesn't, close the book and go to bed.
Try to keep it up for a week and see how you feel. But if you miss a day, it doesn’t matter. There's no streak to break. Call it a diary or call it a journal, but I think diary has a much more romantic ring to it.
